I had a plan for my life. I was focusing on my writing and creating a business with my intuitive abilities. Then several months ago I got some big life-changing news. I am pregnant. My boyfriend and I were not trying and I was on the pill. So when the stick said pregnant, we were both blown away.
So many changes took place with being pregnant. Mentally and physically it has been draining. I am older now than with my previous pregnancies and I can truly feel it. It makes it hard to take those steps with my writing and my intuitive gift.
It has been months since I truly got to use my cards or read people. Having another soul in my aura seems to make things a little difficult for me. I know some people have different experiences and even beliefs than I do. There are some that say you shouldn’t touch your tarot while pregnant, I think that it is dependent on individuals.
This baby has put a hold on me moving forward with my new business, even just opening my Etsy shop. The cards are difficult at the moment and the only person I seem to use my reiki on is the baby. Especially when we started having some high-risk difficulties.
Early on I had a lot of spotting that was monitored. When I was halfway through my first trimester my blood pressure skyrocketed. I have never had an issue with blood pressure before so that was scary. I was shipped off to a specialist to have it monitored. Luckily the medication has it at a normal level.
Then there was one night where I started to bleed. It was not spotting, it was a lot of blood and it was scary. I immediately went to the ER to make sure the baby was okay. It was just so scary. I loved the nurses, the first thing they did was let me hear the heartbeat. And they offered to let me listen as long as I wanted.
The baby is still going strong and they never found a reason for all that blood. I was told it could have been a twin that didn’t make it, but that seemed unlikely as we had never seen one on any of the many ultrasounds I had. With all the high-risk stuff I have had 5 of them.
I really wanted to have a son, I had lost a son and had two beautiful living daughters. So I truly wanted a boy, but this little one is a girl! So I was slightly disappointed, but truly am just wanting her to be healthy. Gender does not matter, just her being very healthy and happy.
This pregnancy was a huge surprise and it has been scary. I had no plans to have another baby and I was actively trying to not have one at all. Though I would not change growing her in my body for anything. She is our happy little accident.
My doctor gave me a goal of at least making it to 25 weeks and we are officially past that! 26 weeks today. We hope to keep her growing even longer, but she is to a point where her survivability outside is doable. I hope she stays in there till the end, and luckily things have calmed down. Blood pressure is still perfect and no more bleeding for the past month. So let’s keep it that way.
I look forward to meeting my happy little accident in late October! <3